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Where Am I Now?

I’ve moved to WordPress. I like Kinky-blogging. I really do. The problem is that all of the engagement I get through Kinky-blogging is from spam-bots. I have spammers constantly trying to sell me SEO services (I know how to do SEO, but I don’t put it on my blog because that is not what the blog is for). I have spammers trying to sell me Viagra (I’m a woman, and my husband is endowed enough and has no problems getting it up, but thanks anyway). They try to sell me weight-loss and health suppliments (I have to be careful what I use for multiple reasons we won’t get into). Sometimes there is no telling what they are trying to sell, I think they’re just attempting click-bait to infect computers or get people’s … Read entire article »

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The Difference Between Fantasy and Fiction

I love writing erotic fiction. I sometimes enjoy reading it. Sometimes. I do not like erotic fiction that blurs lines of consent or is disrespectful – to women, to men, to the community it is writing about, etc. Sometimes when I voice this, people will say “but it is only fantasy.” And this is wrong. There is a difference between fantasy and fiction, and I am going to explain that. I think it is something that many erotica authors either miss or ignore, and our genre and its sub-genres hurt for it. Erotica can be erotic and it can still be respectful. It can sexualize respect and consent and be an incredibly erotic story. You just have to understand … Read entire article »

Fifty Shades of Virginity Fetish

My apologies, gentle reader, for not updating in a while. I have been very busy, and I am working – again – on my time management. That being said, I have had something I have wanted to write about for a while now. The Virgin Fetish. What is the Virgin Fetish? The Virginity Fetish is a focus on sexual purity. In erotica, it is the focus on sexual purity as a means for arousal and sexual gratification. So long as it is presented in a way that is respectful of the players in question, as long as all players in question exercise their Agency, I personally find nothing wrong with the erotic use of the Virgin Fetish in … Read entire article »

Reflections of You

Friday had a few head-desk moments for me. You know those moments. You read, watch, or listen to something that makes you just want to hit your head on a desk because you cannot believe anyone would be so – well, so whatever sets you off. It did help me to realize something important, though, in a way that I had not considered before. Because as it went on, I was thinking to myself – self, it would be great if I could contact this person’s D-type to let him/her know how – well. I would say that she was confused, but that does not cut it. We are talking about a level of miscommunication and stubborn … Read entire article »

Philosophy of BDSM

I think everyone has their own philosophy about what BDSM is – beyond the make up of the acronym and the what/how-tos of those things. I know I have touched on my own philosophy in discreet ways, related to my thoughts on Dominance and submission, things like that. I thought it might be a good time to give a more holistic philosophy, though, on what BDSM is, in my world view anyway. Why Philosophy Matters It is fine to dabble in things, to have a brushing interest or want to pick out things to help flavor and spice the rest of your life. We do that with all sorts of things. When we have those passing interests … Read entire article »